Seeing this world

I'm having the redness in my eye again, this time more painful.

I seriously hated it, because I had to wear glasses and it makes my life very dysfunctional. I always need my spectacles like a security blanket to wherever I go.

And yet, I can't wear it for more than 2 hours, especially to be facing the monitor for the whole day. Cos I tend to feel dizzy, and it makes the temples strained ALOT. By end of the day, my eyes feel really tired and slightly sore too.

On my way back home today, i just felt really sulky. God's being unfair. Why do I am shortsighted? Without glasses, everything is blurred. The surroundings just looked blurred. Only with contacts (clearer sight),I could see details around me.

Like a little girl in her pink dress and a smiley star hairband. Old man in singlet, jogging and perspiring profusely with sweat dripping down his ear, down his neck like stream. An ugly Subaru with Badz Badz Maru sticker plastered over the passenger door, and inside was a bespectacled guy in mid-thirties talking on his bluetooth.

I asked around about my eye condition and everyone told me, most likely I wouldnt be able to wear contacts anymore. And this further adds on to my inferior complex about how I look. I couldn't imagine me looking like my IC photo again.. and the fear of not looking like a bride, not being able to see clearly things around me, notice who's walking towards me, unable to tell the expressions of people I care about.

I hope, I really hope, I can get my eyes cured. I wouldnt ask for perfect eye sight, I just want to be able to wear contacts again.